I try and promote a sense of serenity and amazement with most of the articles I write on my site. However, there comes a time when even a Spiritual Warrior and Seeker of the Way is challenged to the point where the patience of a saint would be strained. Well, this might be long-winded or quite short and explosive, I won’t know until I’ve finished writing. So here goes, my first rant and cathartic purge.
I live my life by a simple code:
- do the right thing
- be the best you can be
- help others who are unable to help themselves
- service to others is not servitude but giving of yourself to ease the burden of others.
Bearing this in mind I have sought employment with various organisations and in different industries where I was able to ‘practice my ethics’ without being self-conscious or being derided for my optimism. That is until recently. I took up a position with an organisation that prides itself on doing good works and providing aid to others.
Imagine my surprise when I find that the outward appearance belied the inward reality. Surprised! Yes I certainly was. I could hardly believe that within the area I was working there were people who were outwardly wonderful and generous while inwardly petty and small minded. I have heard of this happening, experienced other people’s pain at having been subject to the acidic actions of human decay, yet I had never directly been subjected to it myself.
To be spoken to openly and publicly as though you are appreciated and then to be privately derided is a humiliating experience. The corrosive and vitriolic poison of such a black personality quickly erodes the shine from your knightly armour leaving you dull, lifeless and feeling unworthy. How utterly amazing to have been subjected to something like this. I lost confidence in my skills, my knowledge and inner light.
Fortunately there is a happy outcome to this experience. I noted that not all the employees within this organisation suffered from the malady afflicting those who almost obscured my sense of self. My support mechanisms kicked in and I found the strength within my family to rekindle my inner light, my confidence. I survive and so does my simple life code.
“What doesn’t kill us only makes us stronger.” Friedrich Nietzsche
The path of the Spiritual Warrior is fraught with dangers. I have met my fair share and now have come face to face with the ultimate predator of light: a person who manifests antipathy, negativity and darkness as easily and as naturally as breathing.
While this article was a purge for me, it is also written to provide a beacon of support to others who may be suffering similar circumstances. Know this, that as a Seeker of the Way, a fellow pathfinder and Spiritual Warrior, you are not alone. There are those around you whose love and support will heal you and guide you back to the light.
It would be wonderful for those of you reading this to leave a comment and share your experiences.
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Many people are battling their demons. The people that are losing those battles are the ones that are ignorant of their battle.
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This hits the mark for so many aspects of life. I’ve experienced the various “rip-offs” in work and in spiritual practice. I am particularly vexed by those who “sell the Dharma,” “preaching for profit.” But it’s no less problematic when it comes up relative to daily work.
John
Thank you for the understanding you demonstrate. I intend to continue to do the best I can to bring light to the world as it is something that I enjoy and do not find a burden.
Wow, sounds like something I would expect from a life-coaching company. Whenever I attend those events, I always feel that they’re cashing-in on people being lost. I take what I can and then ignore the marketing ploys.
I’m sorry that you had to go through all that but I am glad to hear that you were able to re-claim your inner fire. This is the path of Warriors of the Light, which you carry out graciously. Thank you for your continued sharing of wisdom, as a brother Wolf, I learn something new each time