Every story of conscious evolution is interesting, different, unique and only elaborates on the fact that there are so many ways to reach the truth, to reinstate so to speak one’s true self 1. Mine began in earnest twenty years ago when I walked into my office at work, looked around and thought. I don’t belong here anymore. It was a frightening feeling, a thought, a feeling that I wasn’t sure how to navigate around but forward I pressed. Had I known what lay ahead I may have been more reticent than my intuitive hunch gave clues to!!
Leading up to this moment I had been instrumental in my professional life in revamping the entire training system for a whole industry. Previously all serious education lay in the hands of the ivory tower educators of university status, a system too unwieldy, arrogant and not at all meeting the actual needs of employers/employees. I developed an incremental training system that introduced people to an industry with “only” the qualifications they needed and no excess baggage. The ability to, accredit each mini-qualification and build up to a stronger and appropriate preparation for dealing with what the industry required. So even then I was looking for hands-on, immediate and more real, appropriate means to be versed in life’s requirements.
A song that always expressed the truth of my life was the old number “Is that all there is?” and perhaps my ever-present question to myself…Is this it? Is this all there is? Mind you I had a comparatively great life and yet it needed more depth, more meaning, more of something that I could really believe in, really connect with and so my personal life became transformed by the words of a Buddhist monk with whom I studied meditation…he said, “You create your own reality…mind precedes matter, mind precedes phenomena” and so began my passionate, ardent and a totally tenacious fixation with any personal development, enlightening material, books, courses, gurus and whatever I could get my hands on that served to inspire me and enlighten my spiritual life, open my mind further to the notion that my fate was in my hands and my choices created my life .
And, at this point my spirituality was about to move from vicarious engagement via the delving into others experiences and insights to…visceral commitment to a deeply personal journey comprised of my own prodigal trek away from soul connection via the route of socio-cultural programming into the indoctrination of a worldview, a reality that bites deep into your being and sets in place a blueprint for life…and then, hopefully back home to the source of me and cosmic oneness.
Away from and back home to happiness as the getting of wisdom process.
Led by the “voice within” I began to turn all of my attention to the sensations, feelings and the emotions that were evoked within my body, triggered by I suppose the difference between how my life “ACTUALLY” was, to what my intuition and insights gained from exposure to spiritual ideas told me it could be. I noticed that when I aspired to a higher way of living, contrary to what I had lived, up till now in my world a situation my body would respond…a behaviour or incident could ignite or shall we say trigger a negative or contrary emotional response in my physiology. I learnt to not be run by it, medicate or eradicate it, but rather watch it, wonder about it, talk to it, ask it, what are you? Where are you from? I could track it, like a detective might find a clue and trace it back to its origin and find the culprit, I could find the original moment in time when the enculturation “event” occurred which literally derailed my own natural spiritual a-tune-ment to oneness and the comfort/happiness. That means, from a sense of wholeness…down the track towards the more fear based “fight or flight” notions of a more animalistic perspective of life.
I was always fascinated by the saying, “If I only knew then what I know now!” Well, now I could do that. I could literally take my now wisdom back into that past event and delete old fear based files in my consciousness and reinstate values like love, hope, joy, faith, knowing and then return to the present and be more whole than I was a moment ago, and I would immediately notice the changes in how my life unfolded, now I am creating my reality differently, now I am creating a reality more attuned to who I know myself to truly be, rather than what my historical cultural teachers created for me as a version of reality that tasted yuk even at the time but what choice did I have then, if I was to survive and be loved and approved of.
For twenty years I have devoted my life to a conscious process of mining the truth behind each unpleasant, uncomfortable or painful emotion in my body. 24/7 I have shifted my attention into the vibration of each sensation as my body would deliver it to me. I would sit with it, move into it and literally discover its story, mine the gold and come up renewed and wiser for the discoveries. Much wisdom and information have been gained in this process and all of it visceral, all of it firsthand.
It’s MY STORY and tailor made to my unfolding journey.
I’ve learnt in those 20 years in a way no-one could have told me that would have stuck within me, that we truly are spiritual beings in a human experience and as such live like schizophrenics in our experience of duality and paradox. Our human self has an animalistic part which defers to the flight or flight instinct and is motivated largely by fear. Our human animal aspect fears death, fears fate, fears life as being unsupportive, harsh and competitive, it feels ignorant and senses powers greater than it that define and decide its fate. It can be sucked into venerating authorities greater than it…it will take someone else’s word for it more so than its own senses as it doesn’t trust what it sees.
Meanwhile we also live with our spiritual self which is motivated and driven by love, it knows it’s own immortality to be how it is and senses the one truth of all life, that we are all cosmically connected in one unified field of energy. It experiences it’s soul as the god force and knows it creates its own reality in a friendly universe that is ultimately supportive. It knows and has cellular memory which it can access and be one with so all of the knowledge and information it needs it already has access to.
We humans can interpret our reality and draw conclusions based on our observations from an animalistic or spiritual perspective. When Darwin observed animal behaviour and developed the ethos of survival of the fittest, or Newton described cause and effect each was confining their observations to superficial behaviour that just saw what happened on the surface of concrete reality and did not look deeper into the soul of the situation. Neither asked what caused the phenomena and how it related to man’s soul. When Einstein was given a compass at the age of eight, he automatically observed it from a spiritual point of view, he asked what force was moving the compass needle and thus the theory of relativity was born. The animalistic and perhaps “normal” everyday use of the compass is to look at where it is pointing, not how it’s doing what it’s doing. Our spiritual selves always look deeper while our animal selves, more attuned to survival merely cope with what appears to be happening.
We live with this contradiction within us always and our journey is always about mining the deeper truths and animating our human selves with our deeper spiritual knowing. We’re here to blend two opposite points of view so that the less aware point of view gives way to the more aware and both make the very most of what it is to be human, a soul inhabiting a physical circumstance.
I sense the spiritual metaphor in the legendary garden of Eden story is about our spiritual selves floating unknowing in the bliss of cosmic consciousness enjoying the ocean of wonder without a clue about what’s going on…not the wherewithal for intimate and intense connection to what could be the physical manifestation of this spiritual paradise. We were told, we were warned how it would be…IF we were willing to endure the journey of conscious awakening…this journey of evolving minds capable of consciously knowing paradise would take us to all the opposite places first, but we had to do it didn’t we, and here we are. We are where we are…so far!
And there’s always more.
Image source: Eye of God, Transforming Storm, Cosmic Consciousness, Spiritual Beings, Human Animal Nature
- All emphasis and bolding has been included by Timberwolf ↩
Wow so stunning! Thats’s going to inspire me even more
Thank you Wowie
I am pleased that you gained something from Ursula’s article. It is very insightful.
We look forward to hearing from you again.
Timberwolf
Wow, you made The Lights shine, as I read your article…looking forward for more to come 🙂
Hello Kai – thanks for the comment. I too am waiting for a new installment from Ursula. She has been having some internet problems and we hope to bring you a new article soon.
Timberwolf
Ah, thanks for clearing that up for me. I now get what you mean.
That’s pretty amazing about the horse. What have you named her? In regards to animal guides, I, too, share a growing bond. My most recent addition (through a dream) has been the polar bear. He is currently teaching me about energy management because I often suffer from bouts of procrastination. The funny thing, though, is that most of my animal spirits/guides are white. What do you think that says? (Oh, btw, I have that same ‘Animal Speak’ book you got featured on your site. I actually received it as a gift on Christmas Day!)
.-= George S.´s last blog ..Have You Ever Wanted To Be Fearless Like Riddick? =-.
My horse ( she’s an arabian) came with the name Sheeba…….which is quite weird because my mother once mentioned a psychic told her she was the Queen of Sheeba in a past life, in reality it was her way of ridiculing my ability to see past lives……..Sheeba is white and on the day she came I saw three white horses, by that I mean in ads, posters and an actual one….so her arrival was duly heralded!! She came with a reputation for kicking and biting and being a major B****yet, never has she done any such thing to me, she’s very affectionate……..she loves me and talks to me, whinnies and runs over as soon as she sees me, follows me like a puppy…..she doesn’t suffer fools lightly and lets you know who she likes and dislikes with teeth or a boot !! I adore her rambunctious naughty nature and Soooooo trust her judgement where people are concerned, you can almost see her roll her eyes in disdain…it’s very funny, she has been a marvellous teacher for me………..And to your post, how magically synchronistic…..the email notifying me arrived at the very moment I was asking myself a question regarding the purity of my own heart as a child….and what happened to it……..your question regarding the white animals also pertains to why Sheeba is white ( hadn’t seen that before) although people are afraid of her I never have been………I know she knows I honour her choosing me as her owner, I know she knows neglecting her is not an option and that I love and trust her implicitly………..”white” for you as well means purity of heart and spirit….trusting your own inner is critical to being authentic in what you do, sometimes what we think is procrastination isn’t that at all….I used to think I procrastinated, now I know that’s not it…….if my passion and intent is on target and aligned in truth…. wild horses can’t stop me…..some of us who had our inner purity muddied at an early age vehemently protect our fragile core self and we make sure that all the pieces are in place and our intent is totally aligned with our highest good before we move. Right time and right use of will means things flow much better and less energy is wasted on needless struggle with polarity……just a one way street free of obstacles….that’s the way to do it.
Thankyou George, I am glad you enjoyed the post and found it enlightening. I’ll be sure to check out your article on Riddick this weekend…..my sense of our animalistic nature is that there’s a level within us where we are motivated by survival and fear of our own annihilation( it’s this we are here to move beyond) ………as human’s we certainly are aware that we need to always reach to a place beyond animalistic behavior ( even if we don’t always succeed) it’s fascinating to think that we humans are the only creatures that live knowing we die…….animals may sense impending death but they don’t live with the knowledge from an early age………I doubt animals ponder their spiritual nature or make choices based on spiritual awareness but I believe they act as mirror reflection for our own nature…they sense who we are and behave accordingly…..the dog whisperer treats dogs based on the fact that they mirror their owners issues/personalities….animals are psychic and communicate telepathically………their unconditional love is the ideal we seek, animals for me have always been the opportunity to experience love when “real” life denied it to me. Got me through some rough patches as a child!!
Nowadays the animals I attract into my life always have significant lessons to teach me and they become significant spiritual metaphors for my journey!!! Recently a horse came to my property and, well maybe you a right, she took one look at me and decided I was her new owner…………..Cheers
Great insight Ursula! The two things that stood out for me was the quote about “mind preceding matter,” and Einstein’s spiritual hunger leading to the theory of relativity.
In regards to the dualistic spirit section, I believe that, yes, on the surface most of us behave like animals. However, just because we have seemingly heightened cognitive abilities, it doesn’t make other animals any less self-aware. Is it possible that certain animals ponder their spiritual selves just as much as humans, only differently?
Great post!
.-= George S.´s last blog ..Have You Ever Wanted To Be Fearless Like Riddick? =-.